Where have the good men gone? essay

‘’Where Have the Good Men Gone? ’’ is what Kay Hymowitz wants to know in her latest Wall St. Journal, published on February 19th 2011. Her argument, which appears to be largely based on Judd Apatow movies, is that young American men do not grow up. Her other book, “ Manning Up” received brilliant reviews, saying it was ‘’fascinating’’ and ‘’brutally honest’’. ‘’Where Have the Good Men Gone’’ even formed part of a live chat involving men and women debating about this controversial topic; some agreeing, some disagreeing and plenty caught in between.

Where Have the Good Men Gone’’ seems to enforce almost every single stereotype of young, American men. Hymowitz stereotypes that ‘’most men in their 20s hang out in a novel sort of limbo..

responsible self reliance. ” She assumes that all American men act like this and the ones who act differently are not considered as young American men. She says, “ this pre-adulthood has much to recommend it, especially for the college educated.

’’ According to Hymowitz, in this new ‘ pre adulthood’, young men are choosing video games or reruns on the Cartoon Network over adult responsibilities – namely marriage. To a large extent, I agree with Hymowitz and the onset of ‘’pre adulthood’’. In addition, I also believe that today in the 21st century, American society has a lot to do with the different perspective towards marriage, compared to the 20th century, where marriage was mandatory. Four out of five people surveyed in 1957 believe that preferring to remain single is ‘ sick’ or ‘ immoral’. During an interview with NPR, Hymowitz agreed that ‘’the changing American economy has played a tremendous role in shifting young men’s attitude towards marriage. ’ In her article, she believes that all immature men like watching ‘ action, space craft’’ movies; this enforces the point of something a stereotypical young American man would like. Comedian, Julie Klausner comments that ‘’guys watch stars wars like it’s a movie for half their age.

’’ I personally do not see any wrong in watching ‘’star wars’’ as it is a universal movie with mass appeal and an age limit should not be set for this kind of movie. Kay Hymowitz’ perception of a young American man, in my opinion, is incorrect and unjustified as she does not have proper statistics to back up her view. Hymowitz continues her article by making a point that women have more confidence and drive. She supports her point by saying that ‘’most professors tell it’’. The use of ‘’most professors’’ seems vague; as she could have put a figure of how many professors she has interviewed to make her point accurate. Therefore, it is untrue when she biasedly states this. It is actually men who have more confidence and drive as they are stereotyped to be the breadwinners, and women who just stay at home.

Women being mothers naturally have maternal instincts and their first priority will always be their children. Consequently, there would be a higher chance of a women quitting if a job gets too hard. Statistics show that women without children are more likely to be in employment, at 73 per cent. To conclude, Hymowitz’ point is inaccurate as her use of evidence is too vague and consequently weakens her argument. In addition to that, Hymowitz tries proving her point that young American man do not grow up by using cultural reference. She bases her argument on the movie ‘ Knocked Up’ which apparently was a hit movie in 2007, however this is untrue as statistics from the film website show the top 10 US movies of the 90s and 00s and ‘ Knocked Up’ isn’t one.

Hymowitz describes the male role who is a ’23 year old Ben Stone, who has a drunken fling with Allison Scott (female lead) and gets her pregnant. ” Hymowitz has taken this to the extreme as she has chosen a movie with an obvious irresponsible male lead. However, I could argue against her point (that young American men do not grow up) with the movie Titanic that was actually a hit movie in the 90s. The movie is made up of a strong willed male lead played by Leonardo Dicaprio who actually ends up sacrificing his own life for the female lead. In this paragraph Hymowitz gives an inaccurate response to provoke peoples’ thoughts. In the final paragraph, Hymowitz belittles the fact that men too have a role in the society. However, over the years women have progressed in society and they have become more educated and are recognized in senior positions.

In fact, without men we would have the great leaders that we have today. Moreover, Hymowitz points out that ‘’qualities of character men..

’’ are optional as well as becoming ‘’husbands and fathers’’. However there are jobs for men that need to show courage and physical strength for example the pressure of being a pilot or the physical strength needed to be in the army. She ends her article by saying, ‘’women either give up on any idea of a husband and kids.

. without the troublesome man. ’’ I personally think that this is wrong because women do need men. I think that women who ‘’go to a sperm bank’’ without a ‘’husband’’ give up on the institution of marriage. Children need to be brought up by both parents; statistics show that in America, 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes.

To a large extent, I disagree very much with Hymowitz and her interpretation of a relationship as she nullifies the whole concept. Overall, Hymowitz has written an article that has peaked with success and sparked interest and controversy throughout the world. Whether her intention was to be funny, or to really question the thoughts of men and women, all motives aside, I personally disagree with what she has to say and I believe that her illustrations of young men are exaggerated and shouldn’t be the representation of young American men today.