Satire in Lupita Nyongo interview LM: Lupita, I want to thank you very much for making time and coming over for this interview. LN: No problem dear. It’s an honor and a privilege to be talking to such an excellent presenter from a leading TV station.
LM: On behalf of Citizen TV I want to congratulate you on your Oscar’s award. How does it feel after last night announcement?
LN: Everything is pretty normal. It’s just that I have to spend a couple more hours in the mirror. Even a peck in my eye would be a headline in some magazines, you know.
LM: Walk us through your childhood….
LM: Wow. I grew up as anormal girl. Nothing extra ordinary showed up in my early childhood as my folks say except for attention. I was an attention seeker. Woe unto you who didn’t give it to me cause I could cry my limbs out and make life unbearable for you.
LM: I do understand you father is a prominent politician in Kenya. How did that affect you childhood and your journey to the Oscars?
LN: I used to walk in the streets without anyone noticing who I was. The only attention I got was for my crazy haircuts. Back home, a woman is defined with her hair. Going short or bald was against our traditions.
LM: You must be tipping your barber generously. What a masterpiece you got there. So why did you decide to go short?
LN: Don’t you have eyes? Look at my complexion and picture it with long hair. I’d be probably be standing at someone’s farm somewhere to scare away birds and be paid for it. Anyway, to add to that, my hair used to take a hell lot of time to grow and I am that impatient!
LM: I do understand most producers prefer you coz of you impeccable English and you advanced vocabulary. What are you thoughts on that?
LN: Well, I must confess that whenever I am given an acting role, their seems to be a ubiquitous melancholy amongst the producers themselves, actors and actresses alike. However, I’m not going to change my phraseology just to appease the peasantry, which is you. Hope you carried your dictionary.
LM: I’m sure that after a dictionary I will be able to understand that. Anyway, I want to thank you once again for attending this interview.
LN: It was my pleasure. Its not like I have a ton of work to do anyway. You run the show. Im just here to smile and look cute for the cameras.